Then there’s the cost of a surrogate (called a “gestational carrier” when they carry embryos created from another woman’s eggs). And that’s if it all goes well: if no embryos are created during a cycle, or if the embryos that are don’t lead to a successful pregnancy, they would have to start again. The fertility clinic’s bill (including genetic testing, blood tests, STD screening and a psychiatric evaluation for all parties, sperm testing, egg extraction, insemination, the growing, selecting, freezing and implantation of the resulting embryos): up to $70,000. There’s compensation for the egg donor: no less than $8,000 (£6,600). Maggipinto reels off the price list in a way that only someone who has pored over every item could. That’s when they first became aware of the eye-watering cost of biological parenthood for gay men. “We had the appointment and we were 100% on the same page – let’s move forward with this,” says Maggipinto.
Six months before their wedding, a targeted ad from an organisation called Gay Parents to Be landed in Maggipinto’s Instagram feed, offering free consultations with a fertility doctor who’d give them “the whole rundown” on how they could start a family. “Once I had come out to myself and others, I don’t think my expectation of what my life would look like changed all that much.” With marriage equality won years ago, they expected to be able to have a conventional married life. Briskin, 33, grew up assuming he’d have children.
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